The Legend of the Crazy Monk, Fluke
by ZeroHootsGiven
Summary: AU. This is a Chinese legend set in the past about the RageGamingVideos crew, where some are monks, some are animal spirits, some are demons, and some are just humans, and it goes through the story of the Crazy Monk, the not-so-normal but justice-bringing man, and his name is Fluke. Warning: Story based around Fluke, not much of Rage.
1. Chapter 1

**The Legend of the Crazy Monk, Fluke**

Rated T for language

* * *

**(A/N)** I have no idea why, but I've been into Chinese mythology lately. I mean, it's awesome~ And thus, I asked myself, why not make a RageGamingVideos spoof of it, then?

There was this TV show about a crazy monk too. I decided to make my own variation of it~

Sometimes, I ask myself why I'm so weird. People choose to do Greek mythology, general demon supernatural-ness, monsters, angels, guardians, stuff like that. And what do I choose? CHINESE MYTHOLOGY!

The characters are most, if not all of the crew, and some extras too. The OCs are called Joy, Light and Nyan, and I may add more. ...Yes, Nyan. Also, any pairings in this fic I do not ship, I don't ship real life people together, and it's pretty much all crackship. Also, Juke is genderbent, meaning he is a woman in this fic! :3

So here ya go! Rage is no longer a main character though. We need a change of spotlight anyway. BEHOLD, THE CRAZY MONK, THE LIVING BUDDHA, FLUKE!

* * *

"Hush Rage, keep your voice down, here he comes!"

Joy bit on a bread roll and chewed anxiously as he squatted behind a bush. A fellow monk clothed with blue robes walked past while he fanned himself.

Rage, who was beside Joy, opened his mouth to say something. "Do you think-"

"SHH!" Joy immediately plopped his partner's head down to the ground without any sort of hesitance.

Rage's dirt-caked face peeked up, and the duo watched as the monk came closer and closer towards the trap...

...and walked around it.

"Damn!" grunted Joy.

"Shut up, you motherf-!" yelled Rage, but before he could finish his sentence Joy pushed the both of them down, out of sight.

A sigh rang out through the area. "Rage! Joy!"

The two of them stood up immediately.

"HEEEEEEEELLOO FLUKE!" Rage greeted excessively.

"Why _hello_, Senior Fluke!" said Joy nervously.

"Hello you two!" grinned the monk called Fluke. "Why are you in the forest so early today?"

"W-well, why are YOU in the forest this early?" Rage rebutted.

"Just taking a nice walk~" hummed Fluke. "I suppose you two are also doing so? By the way, Rage, please wash your face, and make it a habit to do it every morning. It's unsightly."

"Sorry, Senior!" Rage hastily started removing the various debris from his face.

"Y-yup! And we've totally been on a walk...!" Joy said rushingly. "It's been nice meeting you, we have to go now!"

"We do?" said Rage, confused, and before he could say anymore Joy had pulled him away, loose bits of dried mud flying off.

Fluke sighed. It wasn't as if he hadn't noticed the trap. It was a pretty good trap, really, but it was obvious who the culprit was. Or more like culprits. _Those two had always wanted to kick him out._ How disrespectful for juniors... He brought up his fan and started fanning himself as he continued walking down the forest.

Suddenly, he heard a disturbance in the forest. Something was rustling beneath the foliage.

Fluke continued to walk forward until he stopped at a seemingly random tree. He jumped up, zooming into the sky, and he landed onto the other side of a tree, where a young man was leaning against the rough bark. He had relatively long hair, and the curls at the ends reached his shoulders.

"Hello!" greeted Fluke cheerily. "I don't recognise you from this place. You must be new here! Are you lost?"

"Yes... Kind of..." muttered the young man unsurely.

"Let me show you the way to the town, eh?"

The young man looked at Fluke warily. "...Alright."

Fluke changed direction from where he was initially headed and continued, humming a tune as the guy followed behind, his guard still up.

"So, where were you from?" asked Fluke.

The young man took a while to reply. "Somewhere over the hill there."

"I see."

They reached the town soon enough. "Here we are, in the town of Skyline! Of course, this isn't the sky, but it's where the particularly superstitious roam~"

The young man shifted his eyes left and right. "Thank you, kind monk. I shall be going now-"

"Not so fast."

The young man became even more suspicious. "...Yes?" he asked.

Fluke chirped as he shifted the young man to a quieter part of the town.

There, light conversations from passersby and hearty laughs from villagers stepping out of stores intertwined in the air, creating a calming atmosphere. Fluke pulled out a tea set from under his robes and placed it onto the ground.

"Uh, I don't really drink tea..." muttered the young man, a little taken aback by his action._ How the hell could that even fit in those robes, anyway?_

"It's okay, since I don't drink tea either. I can't force you." Fluke stuffed it under his robes again.

The young man continued staring in bewilderment.

"So, what's your name?" asked Fluke.

"E-evanz," he replied.

"Hello then, Evanz. I'm Fluke," he grinned.

There was a period of peaceful silence before Fluke spoke up again.

"So, why are you here in Skyline?" he asked.

"...Must you ask so much? I really need to go now..." muttered Evanz uncomfortably.

"No, but I mean, I'm curious to know. There hasn't been a fox spirit in this town for Buddha knows how long."

Evanz looked surprised. "Why do you say that?"

"It's pretty obvious, I noticed how you were jumpy all the time and in that manner," said Fluke, still smiling. "You are a fox spirit, aren't you?"

Evanz stood still for a second, his eyes filling with dread a second before dashing away.

A flash of silvery blue streaked past the route and for a while there was an uproar among everyone in that area.

Fluke just shook his head. He morphed into a red mass and flew across the sky, into the forest, suddenly appearing right in front of Evanz, who was definitely startled to see him again.

Immediately, he started to run away in a different direction, but Fluke had fired a energy blast right in front of his path, and he found himself suddenly unable to move anything further than a metre around, banging into a force field each time he did.

Fluke was approaching him, and he looked at him, fear in his eyes.

"Please don't kill me!" he yelped.

Fluke just chuckled. "I have nothing against foxes. Why would I want to kill you?"

"Well, how am I supposed to know that?!" exclaimed Evanz, sighing of relief. "I mean, usually, monks would kill us on sight!"

"Hey, us monks aren't all like that! Especially the ones in Skyline. We're nice and reasonable. And besides, I find myself not doing what most monks do, anyway. Have you heard of the Crazy Monk that lives in the Sky Temple?"

"Yes, I have," replied Evanz. "The Living Buddha- wait, so YOU are the Crazy Monk?"

"Yup!"

"Oh, so do you really have a habit of drinking a lot of beer like the rumours say?" asked Evanz. "I've always wanted to know..."

"Yes, that too!" Fluke tapped his bottle. "Evanz, just remember what I said about the town's superstition, alright? You may want to stay out of it as often as you can, because unlike the monks, the villagers see all spirits as demons..."

"Yup... Urgh... I better be careful, then..." muttered Evanz.

"Also, ...just asking, but it's pretty unusual for a roaming fox spirit to be male, isn't it? I've never seen one before... You sure you're not secretly a female?"

"Don't insult my gender, please," grumbled Evanz.

"Haha, don't worry I'm not~ I'll let you go now, eh?"

"Thank you!" said Evanz as Fluke removed the barrier.

There was a flash of light, and the human figure was gone; a greyish, slightly blue, sleek fox now in its place. It's fur had a shine to it, and it gave off a strong sense of respect and pride.

"Good luck, Evanz!"

There was a twinkle in the fox's brown eyes and, hurriedly, it scampered away.

* * *

Juke had just gotten out of her room to smell something fragrant wafting from the kitchen.

"Oh shit!" she exclaimed, and immediately rushed there to find Tyde cooking.

"Tyde! I'm so sorry! I was supposed to be the one cooking, argh, Mother-in-law will kill me..."

Tyde immediately stopped what he was doing and headed towards Juke, enveloping her in his arms. "It's alright, I know you're busy..." He gently hugged her.

"But it's my job-"

"Hush. You've been busy, I don't blame you, end of story. Also, you're starting to lose your voice... Take care of yourself, eh? I don't want you to fall sick or anything, and I don't want your beautiful voice to waste away."

Tyde patted her on the back and shuffled her out of the kitchen.

"Tyde, I'll get into trouble if I don't fulfil my basic duties of a wife -" with that, she started to cough.

"Juke, it's okay. Go to your room and rest, okay?"

Juke sighed. "Okay." She smiled at Tyde and gave him a quick peck on his cheek. "Just don't burn the food."

As Juke went back into her room and closed the door, an old woman walked past, gave the door a disgusted look and headed towards the kitchen where the smell was coming from.

"Tyde, you let that woman shirk her work again?!"

"Mother... It's not 'again', she always does her work."

"Uh uh! Not always! Remember that other time she forgot to mop the floor and there was sticky food all over the floor?!"

"Wha- That was a year ago!"

"Doesn't matter! She's useless as a wife, and I tell you what she always does? Stay cooped up in her little room! She rarely even lets you in during the day!"

"Mother, she's busy polishing pearls for her job, I don't want to disturb her then."

"She CLAIMS she's polishing pearls," jeered the old lady. "And plus, what's she doing in her room now when she's supposed to make lunch? She left you to the cooking!"

"She is sick and losing her voice, and I don't want to make her suffer. Please understand."

"She CLAIMS to be sick."

"I can HEAR her losing her voice!"

"And what has her voice done to help us? Nothing! She's just a waste of food and space! The ability to sing won't earn us any money!"

"She has a job too, and contributes her portion of the costs, you have no right to say that! Mother, please show some respect!"

"Only if she shows some respect to me!"

"She does! It's just that you always lash out at her at every chance you get!"

"You see, she's even making us fight!"

"YOU are making- Mother, just get out of the kitchen now, I need to cook."

With a huff, she hobbled out of the kitchen and Tyde sighed.

* * *

Out in the woods somewhere a good distance away from Skyline, a tall and fit man walked down a hilly path, a pair of swords at his disposal, tucked behind his back. He had deep, slightly whitened lines on his forearms, old scars attained from his childhood, and he had a blue, ragged cloth tied across his face, covering his mouth and nose.

Looking up to the sky, he squinted his eyes as he muttered to himself.

"...Sun is over there, ...east is there, west is there..." He used his thumbs to point out the directions.

"...Argh, it's gonna be evening soon..."

He stopped in his tracks and took a few deep breaths. "You've gotten through a whole week of this, Hollow, pull yourself together, nothing's gonna happen."

He had already come so far. Nothing was going to stop him from reaching Skyline, where the Sky Temple was, where the Crazy Monk resided in...

Sighing, he continued trudging along the path.

At the same time, a snowy-white rabbit with a few golden streaks in its fur stood in the bushes, looking at Hollow, fascinated.

Suddenly, a wave of impending danger washed over the rabbit. It twitched around rapidly, hurriedly, warily, and as soon as it saw the slight movement of a silvery creature it sprinted away.

The creature, now alerted to its presence, began to dash after it. The rabbit looked back to its chaser and saw a fox's face, eyes gleaming and full of determination, and it began to sprint faster. No, it did not want to get eaten...

The fox was now hot on its heels, and the rabbit was nearly losing hope, then suddenly, it was no longer being chased. Looking behind, there was no sign of a fox chasing it, but instead the sound of a fox yelping in pain.

It's ears tweaked up in confusion and it began hopping back it's path, and found the very fox that was chasing it stuck in net.

The traps humans set up...

The fox took a look at the rabbit, and the rabbit could see the desperation in the fox's eyes.

Should it release the fox, or should it not...?

Why would it even matter?

Something in the fox's eyes made the rabbit decide to free it.

It swiftly climbed up the nets and started chewing at the ends.

"Hey! We caught something!"

Upon hearing the human voice, the fox looked up at the rabbit anxiously while it continued to munch on the net as fast as it could.

Very soon, the net broke.

"A fox and a rabbit! Lucky day! ...Quick, catch them, they're escaping!"

The two animals immediately ran off while the humans chased after them, and they continued dashing and dashing and dashing...

After quite some time, the animals lost sight of the humans and stopped.

The fox and the rabbit took some time to regain their breath. Then, the rabbit took a look at the fox, and the fox looked back, gratitude brimming in it's eyes.

There was a flash of bright light, and the fox was replaced by a young man with brown eyes and shampoo-commercial-worthy hair, the same commercial worthy haired person who had met the Crazy Monk.

Evanz.

"You would not believe how thankful I am!" he exclaimed, his blood still running with adrenaline. "Thank you so, so much! I am indebted to you for life... I could've died there! Slaughtered! Thank goodness you were there. I'm so sorry I tried to hunt you for food!"

The rabbit gave a cheeky grin and there was another flash, this time the rabbit replaced by a lady with blonde hair.

"Well, I can't blame you, it's the natural order of things," said the rabbit spirit.

"But seriously! I'm really lucky this time. I really, really thought it was the end of the road for me... Thank you! My name is Evanz."

"Hahaha, you're welcome~ My name is Pocket Bunnie, but call me Pocket."

"Definitely wonderful to meet you."

"And, uh, just asking, but, from what I've heard, aren't fox spirits that have cultured the ability to turn human all females? I mean, not many male foxes want to do that, so... Are you actually a female or something? You could tell me. Plus, the hair..."

Evanz sighed. "I am a male. No part of me is female. End of story."

"Haha, okay, got it," said Pocket. "Hey, since you're the only male fox spirit I know by human form, let's train together! I also want to know about how is it different for a male to cultivate the abilities, especially a male fox, and doesn't that sort of make you a male slut-"

"Not all foxes are sluts!" yelled Evanz, outraged. "In fact, not all female foxes are! Just most of them."

"Okay okay, I hit a raw nerve there... Sorry..."

"It's really the least after you saving my life, though, and, I mean, you knew I could just eat you after saving me."

"Yeah! ...You're not gonna make a meal out of me afterwards, right?"

"A life for a life."

"Hooray! And, uh," Pocket shuffled around for a bit, jumping a few times before forming the next part of the sentence, "I know you're a fox and I'm a rabbit, so you could always go against your word and eat me anyway, so usually a friendship like that would be deadly to me, but I am da gangsta bunnie after all, ...but as I was saying, um..." She stretched out her hand. "Can we be friends?"

Slightly amused by her speech, Evanz reached out his hands to grab hers and they shook hands. "Friends."

* * *

It was approaching dusk, and at a mountain top, there was a woman with her eyes closed, her lips moving slightly as she chanted a silent mantra.

Abruptly, she swung her body to the side and a purplish force struck the huge rock in front of her, and it shattered immediately.

She looked up and saw that it was getting dark pretty quickly.

"Don't overwork yourself, Plastic."

She sighed. He wouldn't want her to get too tired.

She clenched her fists. _One day, she'll be able to get her revenge..._

* * *

**(A/N)** Thoughts? Haha. Btw, this is just a for fun thing, not gonna be taken TOO seriously.

Muahaha... Other characters coming soon...

Also disclaimer, I am not a master at Chinese myth, so yeah, it's mostly made up or inaccurate haha


	2. Chapter 2

**(A/N)** So, glasses really weren't a thing in the past... so... Let us all take this moment to imagine Rage without glasses. :)

Basically he's a comic relief. I don't have a very good sense of humour, I don't think, I just don't want so much SERIOUSNESS (the whole writing affair wasn't serious at all) and want to write for fun and Rage does the job perfectly. I'm in a crappy mood now though.

* * *

"But Senior...!" Rage cried in pain. "It was an accident!"

Fluke pulled harder on his ear. "Accident or not, you killed a living soul! Yes, only a bird, but understand that we monks have no valid need to kill these creatures and therefore it is strictly disallowed!"

"OW! Okay! I get it! Let go of me, please!"

Fluke sighed and let go while Rage rubbed his left ear which was still throbbing unpleasantly.

"Joy! Come out here!"

He was hiding...

Without so much of effort, Fluke raised his palm, facing a box at the other side of the room and moved it away, revealing Joy hiding there, huddled into a ball.

"AHHH!"

Fluke rolled his eyes and above Joy's head, he created an energy ball that morphed into a hand-shape. It then grabbed him by the neck, throwing him right on top of Rage.

"ARGH!" yelled Rage. "Joy, you're crushing my... Why are you so HEAVY?!"

"I think you should start exercising, Rage, and so does Joy," Fluke chuckled as he casually walked out of the room.

* * *

He let out a loud sigh and entered the main room of the temple, and an old man with a long, white beard was standing somewhere to the side, ushering Fluke to come forward.

"HELLO, OLD MAN!" Fluke yelled, charging forward to hug the old man's thin frame. Well, what was a hug to Fluke; to the Head of the temple, a bone-crushing tackle of doom.

"H-hello, Fluke, let go of me please..." the old man choked, and Fluke did so, smiling brightly, as if completely oblivious to the old man's coughing afterwards.

"Fluke, don't you think you're being too harsh on your juniors? They are pretty new... And, um, Joy is pretty heavy..."

"Nope! Not at all! They deserve it, and anyway, they're tough nuts."

"Well, the tough nut named Rage is going to crack soon if he continues to stay under Joy! Seriously, I've been crushed by him before... They're 10 times worse than your hugs..."

Fluke went teary-eyed and pouted. "...W-whaddya mean 'worse than my hugs'?" he whispered in a restricted voice. "_YOU DON'T LIKE MY HUGS_?!"

The old man's eyes widened. "No! O-of course not Fluke! I was just joking!"

Fluke's expression took a 180 degree turn and his face was bursting with happiness. "YAY! OLD MAN IS THE BEST!" He gave the old man another hug.

"I think I heard a crack this time..." groaned the man.

Fluke let go. "Okay, Head, SEE YA! LATERZ!" He dashed out of the temple.

The Head of the temple shuddered. What a crazy guy...

* * *

"Finally got up!" heaved Joy as he bent his body to the sides. "You're surprisingly limp, Rage..."

"Maybe it's because my body has become structureless thanks to you!" Rage spat back, still sprawled onto the floor.

"Anyway, before I get any more sidetracked..." Joy said with a certain grandeur to his voice - it slightly being hindered by him biting on a egg roll somehow obtained from his robe, "What nerve of that Nutty Fluke to torture us like that! We're humans, we shouldn't be treated so harshly! And, surely us killing a tiny, tiny bird BY ACCIDENT doesn't mean anything!"

"Well, actually we were just fooling around, therefore not caring about the surroundings, and killed an innocent being for no good reason just for our fun," Rage rebutted, lifting up his pointer to accentuate the fact.

"Rage, don't interrupt me. There's a difference between 'just for fun' and 'just for our fun'."

"It's basically a one word difference with no alterations to the general meaning-"

"I told you to shut up!"

"You didn-"

"Well, I just did, ha!"

"..._Okay, fine_."

"Yes, and continue shutting up. And stop lying on the floor, get up, don't be lazy. We must get our revenge, and kick out the Crazy Monk once and for all..." Joy rubbed his palms evilly.

Rage got up unsteadily, arching his back. "Joy, I think I just disjointed every single bone in my body."

"Come on, be a man!" Joy shouted, slapping Rage hard on the back. Rage toppled to the ground face first.

"Ow..."

* * *

Evanz dipped his hands into the river and suddenly threw them up, causing a blob of water to fly up into the sky. Midair, Evanz stiffened his hands and the water turned into ice, it falling to the floor, scattering ice splinters everywhere, all in a few seconds.

Pocket stared in awe.

"Awesome!" she yelled. "I wish I trained more..." She began hopping around in excitement.

"Nah, its okay, you'll get bette- WAIT, WATCH OUT BEHIND YOU-"

It was too late though, and she hit a rock behind her, the impact nearly knocking her teeth out.

"Oops."

The rock started to roll downwards the gentle slope, which became steeper and steeper as it went faster and faster...

"Double oops."

"Pocket!" yelled Evanz. "My aunt is going to kill me if I actually kill someone this time..."

"What do you mean, 'this time'?!"

"It's irrelevant. In any way, I'm going to be roasted if anyone dies because of that! Let's go check..."

* * *

"...Ow..."

A young lady had half of her body caked in dirt and mud, and she tried to push herself up, though with difficulty.

"Hey! I'm sorry! So the rock did hit someone... You're not dead, are you?"

It was a female voice, and the lady turned her body around. There were two figures approaching her, and as they came closer she saw that there was a male and a female. Guess it was pretty obvious whose voice it belonged to.

"I'm so sorry, lady," said the male (Evanz), coming to her side. "Need help?"

"I don't need 'help', thank you very much," the lady scoffed, but she obviously had some difficulty in getting up herself.

"Geez, I was trying to be nice..." muttered Evanz.

"Come, I'll help," said the female (Pocket). She grabbed onto her arms and with some support, the lady managed to get up.

"Thank you, I guess..." murmured the lady.

"What's your name?" asked Evanz, a bit irritated.

"Light," she replied, her tone calmer.

Evanz brightened up a bit. Guess she wasn't really that bad.

"That's a beautiful name," Evanz commented.

"Oh, I don't need any of your 'compliments', sir," Light spat at him.

Wow...

"Hey, he doesn't mean any harm," Pocket defended him. "I'm really sorry though."

"So... You were the one who nearly killed me there? Idiots..." Light muttered rudely.

"Look, woman! This isn't how you treat people, even if they did something that nearly caused you harm!" shrieked Pocket. "We actually made an effort to check if you were okay and help you up, and this is what we get?!"

"Well, you guys should stop trying to be friends with me then, since you find me so rude," Light muttered, hobbling away without another word.

Evanz and Pocket looked as she walked down slowly to the town. "You think she'll be okay?" asked Pocket.

"Yeah, she should be," replied Evanz. "You know, something tells me that she isn't acting like that for the sake of doing so."

"Yup, and I should have restrained myself there, shouldn't have jumped around. I suck," said Pocket, shaking her head.

"No! It's not your fault!" Evanz exclaimed, turning towards Pocket. "Just... Be more careful, eh?"

Pocket pulled a sheepish face. "Yeah, I should."

* * *

**(A/N)** First, I have exams. So basically I can hardly write at all. Second... I'm a huge Pokemon fan. So basically, my sister used my Platinum game on her DS, tbh her DS was always sort of faulty. Then, I started playing it again, and guess what? My game was corrupted! I can't even blame my sister because it may not have been her. I can't save the game anymore, meaning I cannot trade or anything, all I can do is keep it for show! Effectively, all my good Pokemon disappeared. My Heartgold already went missing... Seriously very depressed. To me its a gigantic thing.

...Lol! I'm not supposed to be ranting about this here. But by any chance you are a Pokemon fan too, just - even if you aren't - Just know the pain, okay?! No mood to edit this chapter properly. But I have to put out something.

And as I shed tears, I bid everyone farewell.


End file.
